I've never spent a lot on finding a remedy.
I guess I figured that it hurt for a reason.
I guess that's why I've always turned to writing it down.
Not just in stories, but the letters in between.
And I guess that's why it haunts the pages of everything-
I think the thing is that I shut off from everything.
From friends and family and my own ambitions.
From having fun.
I just shut off from everything.
Self-defeating? Yeah, probably.
But I don't know that I had total control over it.
And I'm not sure it even matters why.